For a long time now, I've been really concerned about the bickering in the Democratic race, so much so that I've been reluctant to pick a candidate. It seems clear to me now that neither candidate is willing to unite the Democratic Party around a coherent platform of change. Therefore, my only recourse is to endorse McCain.
John McCain is a seasoned leader whose decades of public service have prepared him amply for the position of Commander-in-Chief.
God, even writing this makes me a little nauseous. Why don't I just say "April Fools" now and save us all the heartburn?